The rules of the British summer dictate that (a) one must reveal as much pasty flesh as possible at the first glint of sunshine, and (b) one must embark on a picnic or wheel out the communal barbecue on every possible occasion.
There are now multiple operators in London offering to take the stress out of eating outdoors so you needn't worry about soggy sandwiches and grassy burgers.
For the lah-di-dah luncher, a hamper (preferably prepared by somebody else) would go down a treat. Throwing Egyptian cotton napkins to the wind is the Mandarin Oriental Hyde Park, purveyor of chichi summer picnics in the adjacent green space of Hyde Park.
The hotel's head waiter will - get this - carry and arrange your picnic at your chosen location, be it in the environs of the Princess Di memorial fountain or on an open stretch of verdant royal pasture. From £70 per person (based on two, sharing), the hampers don't come cheap, but they're much less time-expensive and much more appetising than a DIY ham sarnie and warm Pinot Grigio. Call 020 7235 2000 to order.
The Bentley Kempinski is offering chauffeur-and-Champagne picnic packages in a city park of your choice. The hotel is also happy to arrange some rowing on the Serpentine or trotting on horseback through Hyde Park to help you work up an appetite. Call 020 7244 5555.
Italian food favourite Carluccio's offers a selection of fully prepared picnic boxes from £30, including swordfish rolls, fig tart with mascarpone, and a bottle of wine. Visit www.carluccios.com for your nearest branch.
Avoid messy patios and even messier gastroenteritis by letting someone else throw another shrimp on the barbie. The City Café in Westminster boasts a bespoke alfresco barbecue, complete with granite counters and supplementary seating. The café's terrace boasts an overhead canopy and outdoor heaters, so a great big yah-boo-sucks to the weather if the sun fails to shine. Call 020 7932 4600 to book.
On the other (barbecue-burnt) hand, pray for sunshine at London Docklands fooderie A Grelha at the Gun. The Portuguese barbecue and stylish suntrap addendum to the Gun restaurant is entirely alfresco. Eat there while you can - the novelty of an outdoors restaurant in Britain means that it's open only during the summer months, weather permitting. Call 020 7515 5222 to book.
By Jen Crothers