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Regular is the new small

CaffeNero.gif
I was in the queue at my local Caffè Nero earlier today (which I fear I am addicted to) and I saw firsthand the wonderful effect the marketing bods have had on the, you'd think, simple process of buying a coffee.

An older fellow in front of me made the hesitant mistake of asking for a small black coffee and a cup of tea (ah, a coffee bar virgin I thought).

The barista, as we will now call the trained serving staff, let the black coffee request slide by and assumed the poor pup meant americano (double espresso topped up with water in Nero's case).

However small is a term that is obviously unacceptable and beaten into the new recruits during training - perhaps they're given a roasting if they use it? Mean beans - and the girl serving took umbrage at this "rude word" and chastised the customer informing him in no uncertain terms that the only option was regular or large.

Starbucks, I note, plays a similar trick and calls its small coffees tall.

Truth be told this is a huge relief to me as I feared I had a small, expensive house in the arse end of London, but now realise it is in fact a regular structure, even tall.

This to me sounds like a much better use of a few hundred thousand quid and makes my morning coffee all the more enjoyable, so thank you Nero.

Proof that coffee is better than tea?

Buzzword 2: Fresh>>
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Comments (5)

Andrew :

You make good points, but you are wrong about the Starbucks 'tall' drink. They have a 'small' cappucino, but it's not on the menu; you have to ask for it by name.

See http://www.bryanappleyard.com/blog/2007/07/starbucks-secret-cappuccino.php

Chris Druce :

Interesting. I don't know if it's a peculiarity of the concession we have in the building here but our Starbucks definitely lists your options as Tall, Grande and Venti (in size order).

Does anyone know what Costa calls theirs and any other marketing speak terms for food and services?

Chris Druce

Chris, what do they say if you actually *demand* a small cappucino?

Anonymous :

Costa calls there sizes, primo medio and massimo, the italian for small medium and large and most folk can figure out what is ment by them.

The only thing is that people often use sizes from rival coffee companys and this causes issues with the staffs understanding as why would someone with a Costa discount venture into a Starbucks?

Chris Druce :

Thanks for your comments mystery person. It seems there's quite an art to ordering a coffee these days. Even McDonald's offers a range these days. Anyway, I hope you all enjoy your brew of choice.

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